So the reason that I have not posted on here in such a long time is because my little angel, Braydee Nasya Nestor, after a long and valiant struggle for eleven months and three days, passed away due to her heart failing. It is the hardest thing that I have ever gone through. I miss that little girl with all of my heart. She is amazing and I cannot wait until the day we are reunited. I love her and miss her and wish she was still here. I guess I have to move forward, she is always with me.

Have not been here for a while because I have been depressed. I think I am back.

Sitting in the hospital still with my sweet little girl Braydee, just waiting for the day we can go home! It has been since December 17th this time, until today, no breaks. The adventure started last July, on the 27th, when my wife was admitted and then we did not leave the hospital until Braydee was allowed to go home when she was two months old in November. Then she was home three weeks before she was re-admitted to the hospital and had to go in on December 17th, and we have been here since but that is okay! We could have been planning a funeral and instead I am able to still hold her and parent her, she is one of the greatest little things in this world!

Every time that I am forced to face the fact that Braydee may not survive all of the stuff she is going through I get really weak and my body tingles. It hurts so much to picture my life without her, she is one of my best friends and my sweet little daughter whom I love so much. I can’t go on without her, I need her to survive. I love her so much and I feel so selfish when she is in so much pain but I just can’t let her go. I just want her to be happy, healthy, and alive without pain.

So through all of the chaos and everything that we have been through and living in the hospital with our daughter Braydee and having twins and all that goes with that (in addition to the 10+ month hospital stay) I have somehow managed to continue working on my degree and should graduate this year finally! I will then have a BS in Web-Based Application Engineering. Should my beautiful wife and awesome parents read this I really want the new iPad 3 for my graduation present! If not that is cool but that is what I want.